For the first time, I saw someone badmouth TWLOHA. (In case you haven’t heard of them, TWLOHA — To Write Love On Her Arms — is a charity devoted to helping people struggling with depression, self-injury and addiction.) In a thread on Absolute Punk announcing Renee Yohe’s book Purpose for the Pain, someone said
This ‘charity’ doesn’t make sense to me.
and someone else said
as sketchy charities go, I think this one is way up there and I don’t feel the need to support anything that they do. if the girl wants to write a book then fair play to her, she’s got an easy route to do so and a ready made audience. the poetry section looks dire though.
I’m not sure how TWLOHA doesn’t make sense, nor am I sure how they are sketchy. I’ve seen sketchy “non-profit organizations” (namely on MySpace), and they don’t do any sort of public speaking or any other kind of activity. The people at TWLOHA write blogs, talk to real people, attend concerts and speak in front of the audiences about depression/self-injury/addiction, sell merchandise and donate the money made to different charities, run internships, educate people about not only depression/self-injury/addiction but also other things (such as the crises in Uganda, other non-profits that are making a difference, and are currently campaigning to save 1-800-SUICIDE.
Now tell me, how does any of that sound “sketchy”?
Maybe I’m biased, because I’ve struggled with depression and self-injury, and I know people dear to me who have struggled with addiction (and lost the battle). Maybe these experiences make me blind, and my blind self is contributing to the scam that is TWLOHA. I don’t believe this at all. I haven’t seen or heard anything to make me question the people at TWLOHA and their intentions. I haven’t doubted for one second their passion for this cause. It makes me so angry to see people say such slanderous, stupid things. Maybe it’s because they’ve never experienced the pain of depression. Maybe they are some of the lucky ones out there who have never wanted to take their own lives. Maybe they think that people who cut themselves with deadly-sharp knives and burn themselves with cigarettes and lighters are just looking for attention. (Because hurting myself like that is gonna make me so fucking cool, right?) Maybe they think that this is a fad that’s gonna pass.
Depression, self-injury and addiction are not fads. I have seen first-hand, through myself and people I love, what these three things can do to your life. I have known the pain of self-hatred. I’ve lost a friend to addiction. I’ve almost lost family members to addiction. I’ve almost lost a best friend to depression. I’ve seen boyfriends become addicted to alcohol and several drugs. I’ve seen and heard so much about lives being destroyed. Every day I read posts on Letters of Love, and read letters and emails about depression. These are real feelings. You will never know what it is like until you are already there, and by then it’s too late. I am so sick of people judging other people. I am so sick of people who are depressed being put down by those squeaky clean members of society who think they are above everyone else. Of course they don’t “get” TWLOHA. Why would they?
These lyrics from the Flobots song “Stand Up” remind me of what we fight for.
Stand up, we shall not be moved
Except by a child with no socks or shoes
If you’ve got more to give than you’ve got to prove
Put your hands up and I’ll copy you
TWLOHA is mainly about helping people, about reaching out. This charity is the whole reason I started Letters of Love. It’s about reaching out to others and being there to listen. It’s not about fame or glory, or a fad. It’s not about attention. It’s about real people, with real feelings. I know; I’ve been there.
So when I see these comments, like
Eh. Anything having to do with TWLOHA makes me a little wary, to be honest.
or
This “charity” is pretty weird.. I think I read that only 10% (Maybe it was 25%, but still) makes it to actual hotlines and other resources… The rest of it goes to you know, expenses… like their house. and their bungalow. and their trips to the UK so they can spend 5 minutes reading a poem before Switchfoot goes on. It just seems ridiculous to me that everyone buys into it. And the fact that some of the money goes to faith-based charities irks me too.
I just have to laugh. If you don’t get it now, you never will.
We shall not be moved.
Even though i’m a supporter of TWLOHA I can see where they’re coming from. Some people are really lucky to not know what it’s like to self mutilate themselves, so they don’t understand it. Also, lots of charities seem like scams. We know charities have to support themselves, so I don’t mind, but others don’t like to know that fact. They like to think 100% of the money goes to the cause. I can see what they mean though.
Plus I just realized that I do the same thing. When i’m at a grocery store and I see people asking you to buy candybars for their “organization” I think the same exact things those people you mentioned do. They probably just don’t know much about it.
Yeah, I understand that. I just think that before you say things like that, you should actually do your research.
I know of a band who offered to donate thousands of dollars to TWLOHA and was toldd “no” because “we have an image to maintain and protect” and that band (which is a modern rock/alternative band) did not fit the “image” of TWLOHA. So, yes…that seems a tad sketchy. It seems that the people behind this are really just in it to promote themselves to the crowd they want to be cool in.
@Lazer Tron: Thanks for your comment. We definitely have different opinions but I’m always up for a healthy debate.
What band was this and do you have any sort of article or something to back this up? I find it hard to believe that a charity would reject a donation just because of the donor’s image. I have to admit that I’m getting tired of people saying that this organization is just trying to create an image for themselves, despite all of the work they have done.
If you could give me a few reasons why you think they’re just trying to look cool rather than actually help others, I’d really appreciate some enlightenment. I personally haven’t been given any reason to doubt them, but I have seen a lot of people knock them so I’m wondering what their reasons are.
I’m not trying to be sarcastic or an asshole; I’m just really interested in what you said in your comment above and anything else you may have to contribute to the conversation. (I’m also really excited that someone commented on a post so old!)
Okay, the biggest reason that TWLOHA is that their finances are so, so impossible to get information on. I’ve tried emailing TWLOHA themselves a couple times, as well as the orgs the fund, and no-one can ever give me any concrete numbers. There’s also the fact that they weren’t recognized as a non-profit org for a bout two and a half years after they applied, which also looks a little weird.
Most importantly, though, they claim to be non-religious but fund religious orgs. I’m religious myself… i take no issue with faith of any sort. But they claim they’re unconnected to Christianity and yet they donate to Christian charities… and not just Christian, but Christian fundamentalists. If you read up on Mercy Ministries, one of the groups the donate to, you’ll find a whole host of creepy shit going down, ranging from false advertising to psychological abuse and exorcisms as well as anti-homosexual conversion therapy.
The causes of depression, self-injury and addiction are very, very serious causes and they MUST be spoken about and help MUST be available to anyone who needs it… but I think TWLOHA is not the way. Perhaps people should donate directly to some of the more legit groups they finance like S.A.F.E. and Kids Help Phone instead of giving their money to a group that only spends 25% of it on helping people who need it (and some of that goes to groups that support harmful ideas) and 75% of it on useless trips and printing trendy t-shirts for emo kids who think they’re a band. Maybe TWLOHA is just not the way to get help to the people who need it.
@Emily: Any organization that wishes to become a 501(c)3 non-profit has to wait to be approved. I have been running a not-for-profit for over a year and haven’t applied yet for several reasons. It doesn’t make me sketchy; I feel that I need to look into it a bit more carefully before I go ahead and apply. Do you have to be a 501(c)3 to do good? Absolutely not. All it means is that your donors can use their donations to you as a tax deduction. Applying to become a non-profit is not the easiest thing, and it doesn’t happen overnight. Do you have any idea how many organizations are waiting to become non-profits? Sandy Deja explains the many reasons that non-profits have to wait to be approved.
I don’t understand why funding religious organizations looks sketchy. If the organizations they are funding contribute to the overall cause — which is to get treatment to people with addiction, depression, and self-injury — then who cares whether it is a religious organization or not? Most people who are recovering from any of these things use religion as a means to recover.
TWLOHA does not claim to be partial to any group, and states that the organization is all-inclusive in their FAQ:
I couldn’t find anything on the TWLOHA site about Mercy Ministries. Can you get me a link — and not a Wikipedia link, please, since they aren’t a reliable source — that confirms this? I also took a look at the Mercy Ministries website and I can’t find anything about anti-homosexual conversion or exorcisms. Can you get me any links about that, too? That is truly sickening and I really want to look into it.