Nothing about today is good. My back pain is back; I spent last night tossing and turning because not only was it in my lower back but also in my front hips. I also had a bad dream, so all in all it made for a pretty sleepless night. I dreamed I was some blond runaway and my runaway, brunette and abusive boyfriend got me knocked up. He beat me up so bad that I had a miscarriage. The dream flickered to me lying on a hospital table to me in some house where everyone was dead and I had a gun to defend myself from — I’m assuming — my abusive dream boyfriend. Talk about a vivid — and somewhat depressing — mind. I don’t dream that vividly very often, but when I do they’re usually really crazy.
Maybe I’m having more issues with what happened to me than I initially thought.
I went to the chiropractor this afternoon and then to Wal-Mart. I got some stuff to make cards with for the Letters of Love Greeting Card Challenge and stuff for my crafts class on Monday. I also got some sugar cookie mix, which was a pick-me-up — at the time.
Then I got home, and all hell broke loose. Mike and I got into a fight, Lauren and I got into a fight, and now I have no energy to get anything done that I need to get done. I have piles upon piles of things to do, and it’s so overwhelming that I don’t want to do any of it. I hung out with Nikki last night and although it was a nice break it’s just another reminder that I hardly ever get to just relax. Even when I’m hanging out with my friends or Mike, my mind is constantly racing, thinking of all the things I need to get done. I can’t relax, because I’m too busy being preoccupied with what I think I should be doing instead of having fun.
To top it off, my McAfee subscription is expired. I probably shouldn’t be online right now.
Ahh hun! Hugs to you. I know those feelings! Matt and I had to move our bed so we could frame the basement into our new apartment [eventually] and now I sleep like ass because I have to sleep on the left side of the bed facing out, and he needs to sleep by the wall. The left side of the bed is against the wall, so one of us always gets a shitty sleep. We also need to invest in a memory foam because his mattress kills my bones.
I know how it feels to be hanging out with someone and thinking about all the stuff you have to do.
@Sarcastica: I have to sleep away from the wall, so I know how frustrating those silly sleep quirks can be! Thanks, hon. It’s so good to know someone out there is listening.
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