Tag Archives: cell phone

To be brutally honest

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I’m using an old cell phone right now, from the ancient year of 1998. It’s about the size of a house phone and the ring tones are horrid.

I spent most of last night and the early hours of this morning with Mike. I can’t remember much, thanks to Ultram, but I remember laughing a lot and watching a lot of TV.

I’m really worried about my best friend right now. She won’t answer her phone and she hasn’t returned any of my calls in the last couple of days. It’s not like her to shut me out like this. I know she’s been feeling really down lately, and I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but we usually hang out Fridays so I thought she would have called me back by now.

I have a meeting on Tuesday with someone from a big web design freelancing firm. The purpose of the meeting is to discuss my portfolio and skills, and to fill out tax forms. I’m pretty sure that I am now one of their consultants. Hopefully they can get me some extra work really soon. I am trying not to worry about any of my financial problems, but they are always hanging out in the back of my head. My parents think I am bugshit crazy for taking on all of these things right now, but they should know better. I have always been an overachiever. I’m the girl you can count on, because I see everything through to the end, but just like all of those other creative folks, I’m always a hair trigger away from a meltdown.

I’ve become obsessed with hiding my problems. I’m not sure if it’s the right choice, but I’m tired of hiding. It’s nice to meet you, world. I am a talented web designer and writer. I can draw, paint, sing, and I love making handmade cards. I’m also a depressive, quite possibly undiagnosed bipolar or maybe even undiagnosed borderline personality disorder. I refuse to see a counselor or get any other kind of professional help. My current coping method is denial and ice cream.

Now that that’s off my chest.

My cat has been following me around all morning and afternoon. She woke me up with her big mouth, and she won’t stop attention whoring. She is currently curled up on the floor in front of me. She looks kind of depressed. Can someone get her some catnip? I’m busy coding.

Anyone want some bad luck?

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I’m on a bad luck streak. Ready? Set? Go!

Michael and I almost broke up this weekend. We got into several huge fights (which we’ve been doing a lot of lately), and I really thought it was over. Finally, his wit and good looks won me over again and I forgot why I was mad. I guess the old saying, “what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger,” is true. Every time we go through this we end up being closer and stronger. Not to say that I enjoy fighting with him. I’d rather play Street Fighter II and Castle Crashers together like we did last night.

Naturally, the video game spree didn’t last long. It feels like someone is grinding the bones in my hands together. I really wish this would just go away already. It seems to be getting worse, and it’s actually to the point where I’m so used to being in pain that for the most part it doesn’t even phase me anymore.

Things wouldn’t be so bad if I haven’t had my — sorry, guys — period for twelve days now. It was thirteen days late — yes, I keep religious track — and now that it finally came it won’t go away. I think it’s safe to say that I need to change my birth control. I’d apologize again, but it’s natural. Then again, natural for me is just four or five days, not two freaking weeks!

Of course, my phone had to crap out today. It’s been turning itself on over and over again lately — without turning itself off first, mind you — and I knew it was coming, but still. On top of everything else I have to buy a new phone now. It wouldn’t be such a big deal, since I didn’t always have a cell phone anyway, but I recently put my resume in with a freelancing firm and we’ve been playing phone tag. Now they have no way of getting in touch with me.

Speaking of web design, I still need to buy Adobe Creative Suite software so that I can work. And of course I need to finish fixing the Sunfire so I can get to work, and to get to the English class this summer that’s costing me over a thousand dollars.

So, obviously, you all need to send me checks with at least three digit amounts. It only makes sense. ;)

The good news is, I finally finished the redesign for the Letters of Love website. It still has a few bugs (especially in the Community), but it’s functional. So far it’s gotten a lot of praise, which makes me feel good despite everything that’s been going wrong lately. Go check it out and let me know what you think! And yes, this is shameless self-promotion. :D

PS: I haven’t cheated on quitting smoking in two weeks!