Tag Archives: goals

February 2012 Goals

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I majorly messed up January, but I get a waiver only because I spent the last six days of the month on a retail working bender… two of which were overnight, three of which were at six in the morning. Let me tell you, it is not easy going from getting up at 4:30 in the morning to working overnight to getting up at 4:30am again. I’m pretty sure I’m not even real anymore. At least, that’s how I feel. Coffee? Doesn’t even faze me at this point. I spend most of my time giggling about one thing or another.

Not only did I neglect my goals during those last six days, but I also dropped everything to start on a semi-secret project. I’ve been in an editing and revising haze for the last couple of weeks.

January’s goals were:

  • Self-publish one short story. Done. Ten points for Gryffindor!
  • Submit one short story. Oops. Gryffindor just lost ten points.
  • Type up edits for semi-secret project. Half done. Gryffindor gets five points, putting me at… -5 points. [ED 02/02/2012: Clearly I can't do math, because as Blaine pointed out below, this would leave me with five points. So now I lose another ten points for being so horrible at basic addition and subtraction.]

I’ve decided to ramp up my goals for this year a little and self-publish two short stories and submit two short stories each month, and write one short story each week. I might be crazy, but what’s the sense in having a goal if it’s easy? So February’s goals are:

  • Self-publish two short stories. Blaine picked one of them.
  • Write one short story a week. Altogether, I should be writing four or five.
  • Submit two short stories. I’m going to choose two anthologies to submit to and kill two birds with one stone by using two of the new stories I write.
  • Finish semi-secret project edits by 02/05. I have some new material I need to add, and still a ton of typing to do, so this is kind of reckless… but I like it that way.
  • Post one Creative Marketing Minute video every day. Don’t know what I’m talking about? That’s because it’s shiny and new. Check out my YouTube channel. [ED 02/02/2012: Forgot to include this goal when I originally posted this.]

What are your goals this month?

2012 So Far: It’s All Coming Together

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I’ve been horribly lacking in the blogging department lately. I’d apologize, but I’ve been accomplishing a lot. As some of you know, my parents, sister, and I moved in with my grandparents about six years ago. The house is a three-family home, and each apartment is a one-bedroom. Originally, my great-grandmother lived on the first floor and my grandparents lived on the third floor. My great aunt lives on the second floor. When we moved in, my sister and I moved in with my grandparents on the third floor, and my parents moved in with my great-grandmother on the first floor. It was supposed to be temporary, so we literally slapped down mattresses in the middle of each apartment. When Popi got sick, he and Noni moved downstairs and my parents came upstairs. Mike moved in with us on the third floor. Popi passed away. Our apartment continued to look like a hostel rather than a home.

For years, we planned on moving things around, making it look better, but for one reason or another (conflicting schedules, procrastination, etc), it never quite happened. We did finally empty out our storage unit and move everything into the cellar. Mom rearranged the bedroom. I decided to stop waiting for any kind of collaborative effort and took it upon myself to rearrange my sister’s and my room, what was originally our grandparents’ dining room.

For the past six years, our mattresses sat on an angle in the middle of the room, leaving only a slim pathway between the living room and kitchen. It’s still not done, but I moved a lot of furniture around, went through all of my things and took out several garbage bags, vacuumed, dusted… and ended up with this:

Coming together...

Coming together...

There’s still a huge walnut desk and dry sink that need to be moved downstairs so that Noni can use them again (the dry sink is just for decoration), but it’s coming together nicely. Mostly, I’m proud of myself because I thought I couldn’t do anything like this anymore (moving furniture around). I thought it’d be too much on my body… which it was, but I did it anyway. And you know what? Every day after I moved furniture, I felt a little better. Sure, I popped a lot of Tylenol and Tramadol at night after lifting, heaving, and tugging all day, but the sense of pride I felt way outweighed the pain.

I’ve lost a little momentum now, but can’t do much more anyway until the desk and dry sink come out. I have “before” pictures and I can’t wait to show you them with the “after” pictures I’m going to take. I know it’s probably not such a big deal, but knowing I did this all by myself is a big deal to me. Take that, joint pain! Plus, getting anything done around here is a big deal anyway. We’ve all been sardined in here for so long that everyone’s sort of gotten comfortable with it, even though we all complain about the lack of space.

I printed out the first draft of Secondhand Mom, and as I put the pages into plastic page protectors in a binder, I noticed a lot of continuity errors just from speed reading as I went through the stack. I sort of want to edit Secondhand Mom before I work on Sade On the Wall, but I’m not sure yet. I think SOTW will be easier to turn into a second draft, because there aren’t any continuity errors, just some style issues, accuracy with some description, and maybe pace. The more editing and revising I do, the more I love it.

Speaking of which, I’ve edited and revised another short story to be published as an ebook soon. I just need to format the manuscript and haven’t had the chance to do it. I did design a cover, though, and after sleeping on it for a few days, I’m really happy with it and won’t be making any changes. At some point, I’m going to write up a quick post about designing covers.

And continuing with the writing theme… I found a website that has tons of freelance copywriting jobs, and was thinking about trying to make that into my part-time income, but then decided I’d rather spend that time working on my fiction. So, one of my goals for this year have changed, just a little.

I’m really anxious to get this room finished, though, because my whole reason for rearranging it was to create a more organized and comfortable work space for myself. I have a hard time doing any writing when I feel cluttered.

I’ve also been thinking about going back to Facebook. Hear me out. I know I said I wouldn’t, but it’s becoming more and more clear to me that, for marketing purposes, I do probably need to be there, to some extent. I want to get my hands dirtier with self-publishing and submitting stories to markets so that when I start querying Sade On the Wall, I have somewhat of a name and readership built up for myself. I was talking with a friend one night over dinner about self-publishing and she asked me if she could do it, too. “Sure,” I said. “You’d even have a leg up on me, because you still have a Facebook, with friends and family on it who’d support your work.” And it’s true. I gained a lot of readers through Facebook. Half the time, I didn’t even know people were reading until it was casually mentioned, or someone emailed me about a blog post I’d written. I’ve decided that, if I do go back, my personal profile will be completely locked down, and I’ll use it only to run a page focused on my writing. That way, I won’t have to deal with most of the things I hated about Facebook. I haven’t completely decided yet, though.

Speaking of social media, I now have an author profile on Goodreads. This isn’t nearly as cool as it sounds. It’s still the same profile I had before, just more writerly. I’m still relatively unknown… but I’m hoping this will give me a leg up. Maybe I won’t have to return to the devil Facebook. ;)

However — and this is cool — I discovered that Goodreads authors can put their ebooks up for sale there… so “Moon Prayer” is now available on Goodreads. “Moon Prayer” is still not available on Amazon… but De told me it’s because Smashwords and Amazon are at some kind of standstill for negotiations, so I need to upload it to Amazon myself. This is on my mile-long To Do list… which is only getting longer, but I love every minute of this.

I’ve been following De’s successes closely for a long time now, but recently started following the success story of Amanda Hocking as well, and the more I read about either of them, the more possible this all seems. I’m going to be an author. It doesn’t feel far-fetched, like some kind of pipe dream. It feels like a real dream. It still scares me, but in a good way.

If your dreams don't scare you, they're not big enough.

via Pinterest

It’s freeing.

Aside from all that, I’ve been reading, experimenting with clothing and makeup, contemplating cutting my hair, spending time with friends and family, saving my ass off for a Mac and an apartment, snuggling with my cat, loving Mike and falling in love with him over and over, and just enjoying life in general.

It’s all coming together.

Goals for 2012

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I think New Year’s resolutions are stupid, mostly because most people pull any old idea out of thin air, walk around talking about their resolutions, and then don’t stick to them. I stopped making resolutions a few years ago and have since been making short lists of goals I want to accomplish that year (see 2009, 2010, 2011 Part 1, 2011 Part 2). It seems much more productive to me, and I’ve actually done really well with it. It helps me prioritize throughout the year, and since I’m very goal-oriented, helps me feel like I’m constantly improving my life. Without further blahblahblah, here are my goals for 2012:

  • Save for and buy a Mac by December 2012. My Gateway is a dinosaur, and it’s showing. I already wanted to own a Mac and see what it’s like to be an Apple girl, but now that I have an iPhone, I can’t even consider any alternative. I am all about the Apple. This kind of makes me feel snobby, but also makes me feel like I’m part of a super cool club… which really just makes me a huge nerd.
  • Save for and move into an apartment by the summer. This goal looks familiar… Where have I seen it before…? This year, though, I am dead serious about accomplishing this. I love my parents, but I have got to get out from under the same roof as them.
  • Publish one short story a month. At the end of the year, I want to have twelve published short stories. If I’ve submitted a story to three markets and it still hasn’t found a place, I’m self-publishing.
  • Find an agent for Sade On the Wall by December 2012. I know, ambitious, right? I already have a plan in place for this, though. I promised you guys I’d get this published for you, and dammit, I’m going to.
  • Make $100/week from writing by June 2012. I’d like to completely replace my part-time retail job by the end of the year with freelance writing jobs and income from my fiction, and maybe just keep it for ten hours a week, but I think this is a start.

My main goal for 2012, however, is to stop running away when things get hard. I do this in all aspects of my life, and it needs to stop. Every time things get a little bit tight with money or my writing career starts looking impossible, I start thinking about going back to school. Every time Mike and I reach a checkmate, I start wondering whether we’re too different for each other and should part ways. I need to stop being afraid of succeeding and start working so that I can succeed; only I can sabotage myself.

It’s time to stop getting in my own way. I really am my worst enemy.

What are your goals for 2012?

My Strengths and Weaknesses as a Writer: December 2011 Edition

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I found this questionnaire for writers on Ph.D. in Creative Writing. The aim is to revisit it every time you feel you’ve grown as a writer so that you can measure your growth and figure out where you want to go next, or even just look back and see how far you’ve come. It’s not an easy questionnaire, but it definitely put some things in perspective for me and showed me where I need to work harder.

♦

Why do you want to become a writer?

I want to become a writer because stories are always flying into my head and slamming into me, demanding to be written. Writing has always been my best form of communication, and stories have always been my best friends.

What are the books that you return to over and over, and what is it that appeals to you about them?

I’m probably missing some, but I’ve read

  • Ella Enchanted, by Gail Carson Levine
  • Julie of the Wolves, by Jean Craighead George
  • The Dark Tower IV: Wizard and Glass, by Stephen King
  • Prozac Nation, by Elizabeth Wurtzel

again and again, and could read them yet again as soon as I finish them. Each of them have a strong, unique narrative voice. Each of them pulled me in from the very first sentence. All four of them stayed with me long after I read the last sentence, and I think about each of these books on an almost daily basis.

I think you can also add

  • A Clockwork Orange, by Anthony Burgess
  • A Disobedient Girl, by Ru Freeman

to that list, even though I’ve only read them once each so far. Those two novels taught me more about the importance of language than any college course ever could. I’m just grateful that I could perceive what I was learning while reading.

What do you want to write, and why do you want to write it?

I haven’t decided on a genre. I just love writing. I’m not sure yet if this makes me a bad writer or a good one. I do know that I want to write stories that move people the way the books in the list(s) above moved me. I want to write stories that keep people awake at night after reading a bit thinking about what they read. I want to write stories that are so good, I get hate mail for doing this or killing that character in the story. I want to write stories that are so good, they make me cry.

Who might be interested in reading your work?

This is a tough question to answer because I don’t write for one genre. I tend to write stories that don’t fit into one category neatly, so my ideal reader is okay with genres blurring into each other and things that are a little strange.

This question freaks me out a little, honestly, because I’d never really thought about it before. I will have to think about this more and come back to answer it again when I have a better answer.

What are your strengths as a writer?

It’s easier for me to find weaknesses, which is why I, quite honestly, did that section first.

I become a better writer with each story I write.

I write good dialogue.

Even when my stories are dark, they have a twist of humor weaved into them. Maybe this makes me perverse.

I can see what will need to be improved as I’m writing a piece, and edit without feeling too tied to it (most of the time, and this is honestly a relatively new development).

I’m honestly struggling to find anything else to compliment myself on, which is why “I need to have more faith in my writing” is under my weaknesses.

What are your weaknesses?

I need to get better at creating characters. I want to create quirkier, more three-dimensional characters with stronger voices. I wish I could create characters like Joss Whedon or Robert Kirkman. My characters always feel flatter to me when rereading after a period than they do at the time I’ve created them.

I also need to take more risks. I usually write in third person because it’s easier for me. I’d like to try my hand at writing in second person, and I’d love to get better at writing in first person.

I want to get better at creating conflict. I like stories that have multiple problems as well as the character’s main problem. Inner conflict always goes well with simultaneous outer conflict, and I always seem to forget about this.

I need to learn to trust my readers. They don’t really need my descriptions. Actions can describe my characters much, much better.

I also just need to have more faith in my writing.

How would you describe your writing style?

I think I’ve only just begun to really find my writing style, so this is another difficult question. My old English professor — who is a part of the writers’ group I attend — says my narration is very sarcastic. This is rarely the effect I’m going for, so I have to try very hard to tone it down, especially when writing in the third person. This must be why editing was invented.

I would like for my writing style to be its own, rather than heavily influenced by another author. For years, my writing style mirrored Stephen King’s. The sarcasm must be left over from those days. I very much like Joe Meno’s style. I also really like Alice Sebold’s style. I want my style to be hard hitting, like a slap in the face, but not sarcastic. I just want to use language to grab hold of the reader and not let go until they’ve finished the story or novel. I want my style to use language in an interesting, original way; I want to say everyday things in a way that makes the reader stop and think, “Wow, that’s creative.” I do not want to be even remotely cliche.

What do you think writing can do that no other art form can do?

Writing can create other art forms; countless songs, movies, graphic novels, paintings, and more have been inspired by written words. Writing allows people who wouldn’t ordinarily think anything of language see and think about language in a new way. Writing inspires sharing; books are passed from friend to friend to parent to sibling to child to friend. While music and other art forms are shared, I think writing is physically shared the most. It prompts group discussions and creates conversation. I have talked to people I wouldn’t normally talk to countless times because of a book I saw them reading. You can’t see music someone is listening to with headphones.

Writing also transcends time. Today’s one-hit wonder will not be remembered tomorrow, but Kate Chopin’s The Awakening will be read in English classes for years to come. e.e. cummings and Robert Frost will be studied in classrooms for years to come, as well. While Frieda Kahlo and Vincent Van Gogh will be studied, too, literary classrooms will send students home with texts that those students will share with their parents as they do their homework. Paintings on projectors can’t leave classrooms, and reprints can’t walk out of museums, but books can be borrowed from the library.

I love art and music, don’t get me wrong. I just love books more.

What do you think your writing can say or do? Define your vision.

I think my writing can help me discover parts of myself I never knew existed. I also think my writing can show people the good and bad in humanity.

Again, I need to have more faith in my writing; I’m having a really hard time answering this question.

How do you define growth as a writer? What is the next level you’d like to achieve?

I’ve actually written a whole post about how I define growth as a writer, where I am, and where I’d like to be. I think there are four stages:

  • Amateur Writer
  • Decent Writer
  • Good Writer
  • Great Writer

An Amateur Writer has natural talent, has paid attention in English class to grammar and spelling, but they have no technique. She might write stories here and there, and they might be fun, but there may be no conflict or tension, and characters may be flat. She may do these things well, but she always does it accidentally.

A Decent Writer still has natural talent, but she’s finally developing some technique. She has a slight idea of how to create conflict. She knows how to best begin a story. She knows how to create tension, and three-dimensional characters. She may or may not do any of these things well.

A Good Writer has natural talent, knows how to use grammar and spelling effectively, and also knows how to effectively use the things she’s learned about conflict, tension, characterization, and more. She does these things very well in her stories, but still has a lot of learning to do.

A Great Writer rarely relies only on her natural talent and uses all of the things she’s learned to craft excellent stories. She uses conflict and tension effectively, creates three-dimensional, realistic characters, and has developed a voice for herself as a narrator as well as for each of her characters.

Note that none of this has anything to do with editing or getting published. All of these stages are measured by first drafts.

I still think I am somewhere between a Decent Writer and a Good Writer. I feel like I’m really close to becoming a Good Writer, but there is something I’m missing. Maybe it’s that I just don’t write enough. I’m hoping I will find it by writing more, and soon. I’m so close, I can taste it. I just wish I knew what that something is.

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There’s a bonus question for the next time you do the questionnaire:

How have you grown and changed [as a writer] since the last time you answered these questions?

I hope that, when I do this again, I’ll have a long answer for this part.

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Did you do this questionnaire? Leave me a comment with the link so I can see your answers!

♦

[ED: Clarified a great writer's use of natural talent. 12/09/2011]

Why Leaving Scares the Face Off of Me

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This blog.

When I look at the sidebar full of the years I’ve been writing on my own domain, writing about my life, my thoughts, and my feelings, I feel a little sad knowing I’m giving that up. My new blog won’t have that long sidebar going from July 2008 to October 2011 and beyond. It’s only been three years since I started blogging on perpetualsmile.net, and a little over a year since I started blogging on elizawhat.com, but it’s familiar. Going into the unfamiliar is scary, no matter what the situation. Essentially I am letting go of the ability to publicly express every thought and emotion, and replacing it with expressing only in the form of creative writing. I’m a good writer, because I can express myself using words. It’s always been my best form of communication. However, I’d much rather write and publicly share my stories. I know that to do so, I need to cut down on my distractions. I need to let go of my digital security blanket and open myself up to disciplined, daily creative writing.

I also know that in my new career of choice, no parent is going to want to find posts about depression and hemorrhoids when they Google my name before their child starts preschool.

What I know and what I feel are two different things, though.

I’m excited about this new adventure. I really am. And I know it’s okay to be scared, but that doesn’t make it any easier to let go.

Like I said, I’m a digital hoarder.

Still, I’ve made progress. I deleted — really deleted — my Facebook, deleted my Tumblr, deleted my Formspring, and deleted a couple of my extra Twitter accounts.

I’ve set up my new site (which I’ll be showing you soon). I’ve edited the first story I ever published. It was first published in a teeny, tiny publication called Fresh Ink at my community college, and I’m sure no more than one hundred people read it (probably even less than that, unfortunately). I’d like to share it with more people, because I’m proud of it. That story won a contest for me, a $100 gift card to Barnes and Noble, and a priceless compliment from a published writer. I read it yesterday before editing it and still felt proud of it (even though it needed a little more work). The ending still brought tears to my eyes. My own character broke my heart. (This is probably because I am overly sensitive.)

After my final round of edits, I created a cover for it. While I’m done with web design, I still love making graphics. Creating a digital book cover was a learning experience that I really enjoyed, even though it was literally a pain in the neck. (Thank goodness for Tylenol. I’ve been waking up every day with an achy neck.) Today I woke up without a sore neck, but still feel proud of what I accomplished yesterday. I know now that I can do it.

See, when ebooks first started becoming popular, I thought they were just a fad. I also thought they were a way for every man, woman, cat, and dog to put their unedited work out there. I cannot tell you how many technical ebooks I’ve read that, although helpful, were clearly thrown together the night before the writer posted them. I stayed away from most fiction ebooks, too, because I was a little afraid of what I might find.

But epublishing continued to become more popular, and slowly but surely, most people started to see that they needed to be a little more polished about it. De, a writer I met through Twitter, began to delve into epublishing about a year ago. I read as many of her posts on indie publishing as I could, and thought, That’s really cool. I watched her epublish her short stories and then publish a Choose Your Own Adventure type of book through a traditional publisher, and thought, Wow, I wish I could do that. Slowly, I began to see that epublishing could be a way to get your name out there, rather than waiting for someone to accept your story. Paired with traditional submissions, epublishing is just another way of getting your stories read and making people familiar with your name. In the last few weeks, I’ve been reading her posts and thinking, I wonder if I could do that. Now I want to try.

They say that everything happens for a reason. Things didn’t go well for me as a freelance or commercial web designer and social marketing consultant, but I learned a lot about online marketing. I learned enough to be able to market myself, which I’m going to need; indie epublishers don’t have big companies behind them to design their websites, design their book covers, set up book tours, and set up book reviews. It’s every woman or man for themselves, which is both frightening and exhilarating to me.

I think the reason I’m having such a hard time with walking away from this blog is because that means I have to face this scary and exciting thing without being able to run back. It’s been easy for me to write stories and novels and keep them to myself while putting my thoughts out there. I don’t know why I feel so vulnerable about my work but not about my feelings, but here we are.

I’m scared, but that’s okay. I’m only scared because this matters to me. My dream has always been to be a published writer, and this epublishing journey is the first step toward fulfilling that dream.