Why everyone should study another religion

The topic of religion has been bouncing around in my head for the last, oh, two months. I hate labels — especially since many of them carry negative connotation — but I would be considered an atheist, because I don’t believe in a higher power. However, I guess you could also call me a religious voyeur, because I like to learn about different religions. I believe that none of us really know the absolute truth — at least not until we die.

I’ve said before that not knowing what happens when we die makes me feel really uncomfortable if I think about it for too long. I try not to think about it, and try to live my life according to a couple of rules:

  1. Be happy — this might be the only life I get, so I’m not wasting time with anything that doesn’t make me happy,
  2. Take care of the people I love, and
  3. Reach out to other people, because we are all people and should all care about each other (unless someone is a complete douche; then I could give a shit less).

Not believing in any god or following any religion is my personal choice, just like it’s my personal choice to live by the above rules. It’s also my personal choice to educate myself on different religions that interest me, because love or hate the concept of religion, it has and still does play a big part in our society — on an international basis. A brief study of western civilization shows the different roles religion has played, and how it has impacted people*. However, it’s not religion itself that causes people to act; it’s the individual who chooses their actions. Your religion may say, “Give to the less fortunate,” but it’s still a choice. Your nation’s leader may say, “We’re going to take over this country in the name of our religion,” but it’s still that person’s choice, and your choice to follow or walk away.

Religion doesn’t make people bomb abortion clinics or hurtle planes into buildings or donate blood (or not). It’s all in how people interpret their religion, and it all depends on their morals. Someone who tells a pregnant woman that her baby will be cursed because she and the baby’s father aren’t yet married may be using their religion as an excuse, but it all boils down to that person’s own beliefs. We always have a choice of what to say or do, and cannot hide behind our faith (or lack thereof).

Religion itself is not evil because of individuals’ actions, nor are whole religious groups. Religion can be a beautiful and educational concept, if only to learn more about our world’s history. Studies recently showed that atheists tend to know more about various religions than the people who practice them do. That’s not to say that atheists are smarter or better people. It does, however, say that I’m not the only faithless person who has pursued religious study, whether on purpose or not**. I don’t think I’m better, but I do feel proud of having the knowledge that I do have. Knowing that others study multiple religions gives me hope that more people will become educated and will have a valid argument before opening up their mouths and accusing Wiccans of being lamb sacrificing devil worshipers and Muslims of being kamikaze-crazy terrorists. A basic knowledge of either of these religions will tell you that both of their foundations are the exact opposite. Both respect humans and animals, and life in general.

I strongly urge anyone — anyone, of any background, faith, whatever — to study at least two different religions. Just like you would inform yourself of your favorite NFL teams current stats before entering an argument about whether or not you lost this week’s game, you should also inform yourself of other religions before entering an argument about what that religion is or isn’t.


*I honestly didn’t think religion was important until I looked at religion and history together. I was then able to put it into perspective. For example, did you know that Muhammad reformed Arabia’s treatment of women as a result of teaching people about Islam? Women in Arabia were given higher status than women anywhere else in the world at the time — and I didn’t know this until reading The Muslim Next Door. (Thank you, Faiqa!) The teachings of the Qu’ran enabled people to think of men and women as equals, when they had never even thought of it before.

**I didn’t choose to go to Sunday School at my mom’s Protestant church, nor did I choose to go to a Catholic elementary school. I did, however, study several Pagan religions on my own, and continued learning about Islam after my 8th grade teacher gave us a series of lessons on it. I have also studied religions that formed at the time when civilization formed throughout my formal education, and further studied Christianity in college while taking Western Civilization I.

Why I think that opposing the mosque in NYC is not only wrong, but racist

PLEASE REMAIN CIVIL. I know this is a touchy subject for people on all sides, but let’s try to refrain from using words like “ignorant,” “stupid,” “retarded,” and the like. I’d like to keep the comments open and not block anyone. Thanks. • 08/23/2010 at 10:27pm

A few days ago, a Facebook friend invited me to join a Cause: STOP THE BUILDING OF MOSQUE NEAR GROUND ZERO SITE!!!!

I can’t even begin to describe the anger that literally burned through me as I read this Cause page. First of all, I thought Causes were supposed to be legitimate 501c(3) organizations. Apparently Facebook is now letting the masses run rampant. But second — and most importantly — of all, it angered me because it just screams racial profiling, yet again.

Don’t even try to tell me that this cause isn’t, because its description reads:

To send a message to our government that we don’t want this place of worship to be built near the very place they attacked us at.

and

I am trying to send a message to the Government that anything that is to be built that has any involvement with terrorist “i.e. a Mosque” near to the Ground Zero attacks should not just be a Government vote it should be a vote that american people can participate in also.

I simply cannot understand why anyone thinks that Muslim people are the same people as terrorists. That kind of thinking would be like me thinking that just because my neighbor is black, they are going to break into my house. It almost physically sickens me when someone uses the phrase “towel head” or insinuates that the Muslim-American owner of a gas station is plotting to blow us up. (It also pisses me off that anyone these days uses the N word, but that’s another rant for another day.)

Anyone with an actual knowledge of the Islamic religion knows that it’s in actuality a very peaceful religion. You know that Buddhist friend of yours? Islam is pretty similar. It’s based on several principles that say things like, “Don’t brag,” and “Be good to other people.”

Terrorists, on the other hand, are extremist groups pretending to be Muslim, but actual Muslims do not approve of terrorists or anything they stand for. A real Muslim would not call herself a terrorist, and any terrorist who tries to call himself a Muslim is full of shit. Don’t believe me? Go to the book store or library and take out a book on Islam. I am forever grateful to my eighth grade English and religion teacher, Mrs. Barra, who, immediately after 9/11, taught us about the Muslim culture and Islamic religion. She wanted us to understand the difference between a Muslim and a terrorist, and even though I paid little attention to anything that year — it was a rough year — I did pay attention to those lessons.

However, there are too many people right now who are uneducated, and who choose not to believe anything other than what they have been told or have absorbed from the people around them and the media. A perfect example:

Why in the world would we want them there and why would they wanbt to be there unless it is to pour salt in our wound. We have helped and trusted these peopel and look what we get for it. I know that not all of them are anti american but how can you tell one from the other until it is to late. I know we need to relie on God but I also think that he wants us to stand up for our selves. Come on American, wake up! I heard a guy said that he wished he could open a hog farm next door to them… I agree. What kind of president do we have that would let this happen??? Oh yeah.. I almost forgot.

I’m not even going to touch the comment on the President, because I have no way of telling for sure whether she is insinuating he is allowing it because he is black or because his middle name is Hussein (which is an African name as well as a Middle Eastern name, and President Obama’s father is African). However, this person scares me. Why? Because she thinks that because you can’t tell a terrorist from a good Muslim-American, we should just not allow any of them here. This kind of thinking is what led to Japanese- and German-Americans being encamped during World War II. Don’t believe me? You don’t even have to go to the library to get the facts; Google it.

Fear and lack of education leads to drastic reactions. One guy even posted to the Causes page saying:

iam from yew york, go and do it see what will go down,faster then it went up!!..

Going back to the previous comment, the reasons for wanting to build this mosque have been made quite clear by the Muslim-American man who wants to build it:

  • there is a high population of Muslim-Americans in NYC
  • the mosque leader (for lack of a better term) has worked for several years with local Christian and Jewish leaders to promote interfaith understanding, and the mosque would help further that work

I understand that my fellow Americans still see 9/11 as a fresh wound. But don’t you think that it hurts your fellow Muslim-Americans, too? After all, since there are so many Muslim-Americans living in NYC, many of their lives were also lost or affected in some way on that day — and Muslim-Americans as a whole have been affected since. They deal with suspicious stares and whispers, racist comments (I once saw an episode of Cash Cab where one of the contestants got into the cab and said, “A cab driver whose native language is English!”), and persecution similar to the Salem Witch Trials, the Holocaust, and American encampments for Japanese- and German-American citizens*. Can you imagine everyone thinking that you were part of 9/11? And don’t say that it’s their own fault, because it’s not. As Faiqa said, all people of Middle Eastern decent don’t jump onto Skype at the same time and plot the next bombing, just like not all Christians are part of the Ku Klux Klan, not all black people steal and do drugs, and not all single mothers are strippers.

I have heard a lot of people say that building a mosque near Ground Zero — mind you, it’s not being proposed ON Ground Zero, just NEAR — is indecent. Why? A couple of people have even said if anything is to be built there, it should be nondenominational. Let’s toss aside the fact that the mosque wouldn’t be ON Ground Zero, and just concentrate on the issue of whether a mosque would be indecent.

As I said, there is a high population of Muslim-Americans in NYC. Statistically speaking, I have no idea how many exactly, nor do I know how many lost their lives on 9/11, but they did, and they’ve been affected in other ways even after the body count was finished. Building a mosque in that area — near or on — would not actually hurt anyone. If you live in NYC, you don’t have to look at it — just like you don’t have to look at the synagogues or guitarists if they bother you. No one is forcing you to convert. No one is even asking you to donate to the construction of the mosque. All you are being asked is to acknowledge that a group of Americans can construct a place of worship in the center of NYC, where space is available. Let’s face it. If a Baptist church were being proposed, no one would even complain. Even the people that think there shouldn’t be a particular religious building in that area wouldn’t so much as open their mouths. Honestly. The church would go up and that would be that.

If you really think otherwise, please say so and tell me why. Please explain to me why a group of Americans can’t worship where they want. I mean, fuck, I’m not even religious, nor am I of Middle Eastern decent, and yet I feel so strongly about this. Let them build their mosque. It’s not hurting you. If anything, it will help heal our country, because we have got to stop getting so riled up when “the Muslims” want to do something. I’ll leave you with what another commenter on the Causes page said, because his last few sentences sum my feelings up perfectly:

I don’t think I have ever been more ashamed of my country than I am now. “A slap in the face of all Americans.” How about the muslim american victims of the World Trade Center? NYC has one of the largest muslim populations in the country and as a new yorker, I have never met a more peaceful group of people. I think if we are going to dictate where people could build their place of worship, we should get in our time machines and tell the pilgrims to fuck themselves and stop whining that they want religious freedom. Now I understand many people live in parts of the country that are NOT considered melting pots, but here in NYC, that is what makes this the greatest city on earth. Following 9/11, there were blood drives, donations, volunteer efforts from muslim groups in the city….as were there from many other groups. We did not refuse their help then and it’s “unamerican” for us to tell them where they can and can not worship.


*Obviously they are not being slain, but the singling out is the same.

Way beyond my reach

I wish the holidays were over already. Aside from being super stressed out about projects for clients, and worrying like crazy about Popi, I’m now barely going to see Mike on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

In years past, Toys R Us closed at like 6 on Christmas Eve and wasn’t open at all on Christmas Day. This year, they’re still closed on Christmas Day, but they’re open until 8 on Christmas Eve. Scratch that, as of today; Corporate sent an email at the last possible fucking minute and told everyone that they’d be open until 9.

What. The. Fuck.

Why does this matter?

Let me back up. Initially, Mike was scheduled until 8. He was trying to find someone to switch with so he could come over my house and have dinner with Noni, Popi, Biz Noni, Mom, Dad, Lauren, Aunt Wendy, Uncle Lonny, and I, but couldn’t, so he was going to see if he could just leave early because they will probably be dead. Now that they’re going to be open until 9, his boss asked him to stay until they close.

And he agreed.

Trust me when I say he already knows how pissed I am about this.

I understand why he’s doing it. Right now, he’s on great terms with his boss and the district manager, and he really wants to keep those relationships positive in case any higher positions open up. I get that. But still, I had a perfect picture of how Christmas would go, and now it’s just not going to be like that. I can’t help but be selfish and want to have things go my way. So much has not gone my way these last couple of years: my own health, my grandfather’s health, my living situation… I know I should just shut the fuck up and be grateful for what I’ve got. I know that. So many other people have it worse. It just feels like I’ve had a shitty line of luck lately and I guess I was depending on the holidays to be perfect so it could all be better.

To make things worse, I have a huge project deadline for the end of the month that can bleed into the first week of January because of some crazy server issues, but the deadline is making me nauseous because with all of the holiday shit going on, I have barely had time to work on it. Add a whole lot of lack of motivation, and I’m pretty fucked. Fuck you, depression. You’re such a greedy asshole.

So it’s no wonder that I’ve (sort of) picked up smoking again. I made sure not to buy myself a lighter tonight when I picked up a pack of Marlboro Lights. I’ve only had one so far. I don’t feel like I need one now, which is good, I guess. Right now, it’s either smoke or kill someone. Or run away to Florida.

It’s hard to get in the holiday spirit when so much shit is all fucked up. I miss being a little kid, and having only one worry this time of year: Santa not knowing that I really want a Gigapet, or whatever toy. (One year, I asked him every night before bed during this season to bring me a Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. No lie. My love of Reeses started early.)

This year, Santa, all I want is to feel better. Actually, scratch that. I just want everything to go back to the way it was in mid November, when everything was better. When Daddy didn’t lash out every five seconds because he is hurting so badly inside. When I would go to the Barnes and Noble Cafe every afternoon to write with a Pumpkin Spice Latte at my side. When we looked forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas, not a care in the world. When I thought Popi might just have arthritis or a sciatic nerve problem, or something FIXABLE, dammit.

Right now, it feels like nothing in my life is fixable. I feel like I have no friends. I feel like I can’t rant too much to Mike because he is already stressed out enough and I know that by whining that he has to work late tomorrow night, I’m only making it worse. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around my whole family, because I don’t want to say out loud that shit, I don’t believe in god so I have no fucking clue where my grandfather is going to go when he dies.

Fuck.

There it is, guys. There it fucking is.

What I celebrate

You might have guessed by now that I am virtually religionless. For the most part, it doesn’t bother me. During the holidays, I celebrate the time I get to spend with my family and loved ones. I look at the Christmas season (that’s what my family celebrates, so that’s what I call it) as a time for sharing the love with your family and showing appreciation for them. Some people might be bothered by this, but whatever. It’s the way I feel and it doesn’t hurt anyone. (I even hold hands while the rest of the family says grace. It’s not a big deal for me.)

I was baptized Protestant and raised with a looser version of the religion my Mom was raised with. Dad’s family is Catholic and pretty much sticks to a looser, more relaxed version of Catholic tradition: no meat on Christmas Eve, but they don’t walk around swatting people on the head with Bibles, nor do they go to church. (Not to say that Catholics swat people with books. Or maybe some of them do. I know my 8th grade substitute teacher was always close!) My mom’s side of the family is even more relaxed. They’re Protestant, I guess, though now I think my mom’s sister, my Aunt Rikki, is more Catholic because her husband is Catholic and I’m pretty sure they baptized Katarina Catholic. (And I’m pretty sure my other aunt, Aunt Elyne, and her daughter Kate don’t celebrate any religion, either. But anyway.)

You’d think, surrounded by all of this religion, as relaxed as it is, that I would be more religious. I honestly have just never “felt” it. I experimented a little, as a kid. I looked into different religions and tried to find my niche, but nothing ever fit. I just don’t feel the presence that so many people say they feel. And that’s okay. It’s okay for you to feel it and it’s okay for me not to, as long as neither of us tries to force our beliefs on the other.

So during the holiday season, I wrap gifts for the people I love putting that love as my sole focus. I am like a kid waiting for Santa, I’m so excited to give people their gifts. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited about the gifts I’ll get, too, but it’s more important for me to give. And boy do I give. Every year I try to budget and every year I end up going over. Whoops. Even though my checkbook is not thrilled, I am thrilled to see the looks on everyone’s faces when they open their gifts this year, the gifts that I handpicked to show my appreciation. To say, I love you.

And don’t mistake me for putting it all into a material perspective; I’d be fine without giving or receiving gifts. I just look at it as a time of year to share love.

That’s what my holiday season is all about.